Why I decided to quit coaching

I love coaching my daughter in all her sports. I have coached her in t-ball and soccer for a couple years now. I signed up to coach because no one else would. I sign up to help in her dance classes for room moms during the recital performances. I am constantly around because she wants me there. I know one day she won’t so why not enjoy it now right?

I signed up for spring soccer through a city park board. We have played sports through this city for years and I had never had issues. So I was excited. Then soccer started. I emailed all the parents and let them know of where and the time of practice. I was so excited. Mind you I know next to nothing of soccer. What I know is things that I have picked up from other people but hey it is kindergarten soccer so its mostly supposed to be fun.

I held one practice. I had a list of things to cover and I was ok with all the parents ignoring their kids while I taught them the basics. It was nothing new to me to watch parents play on their cell phones or have conversations about so and so while totally ignoring the kids practicing. So I talked to the parents. I won’t lie this is the worst part about being a coach. I hate hate hate talking to the parents. They are always above anything you say. They all want to sign up for snacks though so hey there is always that. It seems like parents feel guilty they don’t pay attention so they compete for best snack at the game award.

So I talked to the parents told them what I expected, let them know how long practices would be (its never long enough) and handed out the sheet for snack person as well as a schedule. I am always prepared because I never want to stumble when talking to the parents. That just gives them a chance to talk back and that never ends well because they all know better than the person who actually deals with their children. So practice of course is not long enough. Why it can’t be longer. Why can’t we practice on the fields we will play at. Question after question that I had previously answered. It is almost like they look for you to stumble so they can strike.

There was one mom that tried to tell me I gave out the wrong game schedule. I looked at her and said no we are the kindergarten team 2. She said oh I thought we were the 4 year old group. I really wanted to say seriously your kid is almost 6 why would they be with 4 year olds. Ok no I am never wrong ma’am I try very hard to ensure that I am always right when dealing with you all. Thank you practice is over I am leaving.

Of course they didn’t like me. I didn’t bow to their ways. So after the third mother asked the same question I sent a mass email answering the question in more detail then needed. The day of the game two moms asked if it was their day for snack. I didn’t sign the sheet, how do you not know what day you sign up for. So I figure I don’t really care if they bring snacks or not to the game so I ignore the first message. Then some how it always becomes about winning. Are our kids going to win. Well I couldn’t tell you because this is a recreational league and it is for fun. We don’t keep score. Well they won a lot last time so we expect to win this year too. No ma’am I don’t coach for kindergarten children to win. They all get some dumb ribbon so what does it matter.

It was at the first game I took the equipment to the director told him I quit and walked away. He asked why. I said well the parents are all about win win win. I am not a babysitter and I don’t get disrespected. He then walked over to the parents and asked if any of them wanted to be the coach. The comments that I overheard made me want to scream. These parents are rude. I told my daughter that after t-ball I am done in that city. The director actually apologized to me because of the things that the parents said.

I am a competitive mom. We have done pageants and sports and next up is competitive cheerleading. With that being said just because I am competitive doesn’t mean I want my daughter to be all about winning. We have won and we have lost gracefully. She is 5 and its all about fun. In 10 years, you better believe if she plays a sport it better be because she wants to be the best. For now, it is to gain the skills and the knowledge to know what she wants to really excel at.

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